I will not forget you...

But Zion said, "The LORD has forsaken me,
       the Lord has forgotten me."
 "Can a mother forget the baby at her breast
       and have no compassion on the child she has borne?
       Though she may forget,
       I will not forget you!
 See, I have engraved you on the palms of my hands;
       your walls are ever before me.
Isaiah 49:14-16

This passage was like water to my soul when we lost our babies.  It struck me in a new way when we brought David home and I adjusted to life with a nursing baby.  Suddenly even getting to the grocery store was complicated.  I had to plan my day with his needs in mind.  I couldn't be separated from him for more than two or three hours without significant planning.  In fact, as a nursing mother, it was physically painful to be away from him for more than a few hours.  Physically, I could not forget him.

A few months ago I wrote down everything I did for Rand in a day to more fully appreciate these words.

6:20  Feed and change Rand
6:40  Hold Rand
6:55  Put Rand on floor with toys
7:07  Hold Rand and do chores
7:15  Put Rand down to play
7:25  Fix Rand breaksfast
7:40  Put Rand in exersaucer
8:00 Hold Rand
8:15  Put Rand down for a nap
11:00 Feed Rand
11:15 Change Rand's diaper
11:20 Load Rand in car seat
11:45 Carry Rand in ergo for grocery store
12:40 Load Rand in car seat
1:00  Hold Rand
1:15 Rand in exersaucer
1:25 Hold Rand
1:35 Rock Rand and put him down for nap
3:30 Nurse Rand
3:45 Change Rand's diaper
3:50 Load Rand in car seat
4:00 Put Rand in exersaucer
4:30 Hold Rand
4:40 Put Rand in baby ergo for chores
5:20 Put Rand in car seat for errands
6:30 Nurse Rand
6:45 Fix Rand's dinner
6:50 Feed Rand dinner
7:10 Nurse Rand
7:20 Change Rand's diaper
7:25 Rock Rand and put him to bed

"Though she may forget, I will not forget you!"