Friday, December 28, 2012

Texting like a bunch of teenage girls...

Cancer sucks in a lot of ways, but it has it's perks, too.  A mere ten seconds of everyday but... unwise (G-rated, for my gutter-minded readers) activity* can transform a pleasant, bordering on boring afternoon into an adrenaline-infused race to the ER.  That's right, Chris forgot about the central line leading DIRECTLY to his heart and decided to do a little home maintenance.  He then had sharp chest pains that resulted in a frantic rush to the hospital.
Stage 1:  (Downside)  Unadulterated panic.  (Upside)  Got to drive 95 mph.  By the way, a surprising number of cars were hanging with me in that. 
Stage 2:  (Downside) Realization that we were going to blow half a day on a minor incident.  (Upside)  Relief  as his pain subsided and it looked like we were just being cautious and not about to add open heart surgery to our list of things to sweat out and pray through. 
Stage 3:  (Downside)  Chris feeling like an idiot.  (Upside) Priceless text stream with my family.
Chris was really feeling bad about his lapse of basic common sense.  Because I'm related to some gifted storytellers who have done some spectacularly stupid stuff, I sent a quick text to my dad, brothers and uncles:
Me:  Quick.  C feeling like an idiot for ______.  Tell  me something you've done that's stupider. 
 First my dad, helpfully, pointed out my grammatical error:
Dad:  You mean worse than saying "stupider"? 
Me:  I appreciate your sensitivity as I wait in the ER at MD FREAKING ANDERSON!!! 
Dad:  I feel insensitiver.
I learned all kind of interesting stuff about my family, none of whom should be allowed near firearms, things that move on wheels, airplanes, water pitchers or explosives.  The six hour wait could have been excruciating but between the book I had in my purse and read aloud** and those hilarious texts (seriously, in extreme circumstances, like 12" of snow in Little Rock, the Aggies beating the hell out of Bama or Chris playing Mr. Fix-It/Chemo Guy, my family can text like a bunch of 16 year old girls) it was actually good time for us, one of those days I'll always remember.

Tomorrow is our 16th anniversary.  Love, love, love this guy.

Bless their hearts, I'm glad they don't know what all's coming.

* Chris is keeping up his own blog these days:  I'm going to give him a few days to out himself before I give all the sordid details here.
** The Future of Us (thanks Kara).  You should always keep a book in your purse.


  1. Wow. That's perfect anniversary reading!

  2. Reading this through tears and giggles. Happy anniversary you two! A sense of humor God gives can help us through so much!

  3. One of the many things I love about our crazy family is the ability to make a joke out of anything, even (especially?) cancer. I am totally texting your dad next time I need a laugh/grammar lesson. Happy 2013!!

  4. Happy Anniversary! Since my main memory of you is the 16 years ago version, I am going to disagree with the "Bless their hearts.." attached to it. I remember you two being carefree and fun, but also brave, tough, smart, and full of faith. I imagine you are not carefree (and this breaks my heart), but I know that you are all of the rest today. I am praying that you are able to reclaim the carefree part. God bless!


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