Saturday, July 31, 2010

Cabin day five...




We went hiking on the Hemlock Hollow Trail today. It was a perfect little guy hike - 1.5 miles of beautiful forest with rocks, bridges and trees with character. It was also the scene of one of life's real triumphs for Bryan - a truly glorious scene for a little brother.

The boys piled up dead branches to make some sort of building. It was really David and Jacob's game with Bryan bouncing around the periphery.

Bryan: Guys, guys, which one do I get?
David: (Trying to humor Bryan and keep him out of the way, points to a small standing tree that's a few inches in diameter) Ummm, get that over there.

The tree is apparently dead and barely attached to the ground. Bryan pulls it from the ground.

David: Woah! Bryan, how did you do that???
Jacob: Wow Bryan, you're so strong.
Bryan: Mommy, I fink you need to change my name to Superman.


At the end of the day, David and I sat on the deck together while the little guys slept - beautiful time.
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Friday, July 30, 2010

Cabin day four...

Today was more of the same - biking, swimming, reading, playing,...


Plus, Chris surprised the boys with a visit


and we had blueberry pancakes for dinner. David had 7 and Rand had two. I'm going to add a paypal button for donations toward food when they're teenagers.







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Thursday, July 29, 2010

Cabin day three...




David had a spectacular bike crash. He did a somersault with his bike and apparently rolled over a tick village. He had five or six crawling on him. There's nothing like an army of parasites to take your mind off a traumatic bike crash.


I had a pretty lame bike wreck. The babies didn't even notice. David saved us from losing our way in the woods. He noticed that the trail looked unfamiliar. We had passed our turn about 100 yards back.


We found an even better swimming spot.

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Wednesday, July 28, 2010

Cabin day two...

Ate Frosted Flakes because "they make you better at soccer" according to Jacob.


Found a skeleton in the woods - freaky


Ran down a hill screaming again and again and again





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Tuesday, July 27, 2010

Cabin day one...

Rode our bikes through the woods to the river.



Built cities for bugs in the woods.



I sat down to read a chapter of My Father's Dragon to the boys and wound up reading the whole thing. At the end of each chapter: "One more, please one more."

Saturday, July 24, 2010

War and peace...

I'm about halfway through War and Peace, and I love it.  It will definitely make my top ten all time favorite books.  (Before you read on, please take a moment to be very impressed that I am reading this book.)  I love the way Tolstoy paints characters.  He sees human nature with a penetrating eye.  One of the characters, Pierre Bezukhov, is painfully familiar.  He is compassionate, open-hearted and has the best intentions and principles.  But when it is time to make a difficult decision or act on those principles, he never chooses the hard, right thing.  He always takes the easy path.  He has difficulty detecting when someone around him is flattering him.  He assumes that they are sincere.  At first glance it seems that he makes this assumption because he is a kind-hearted man with a generous spirit.  That is not the real reason, though.  The real reason is arrogance.  It just doesn't appear to be arrogance because he truly is kind.  Here are a couple of quotes about him that were uncomfortable to read:

Volume I, Part III, Chapter I
"It seemed so natural to Pierre that he should be liked by one and all, and it would have seemed so unnatural if anyone had not liked him, that he couldn't help believing in the sincerity of everyone around him."

Volume II, Part V, Chapter I
Pierre has slipped back into the indulgent lifestyle of an idol rich man.
"It took him a very long time to become reconciled to the idea that he was the very model of a retired Moscow gentleman-in-waiting, a type he had found so profoundly repellend seven years ago. 

Sometimes he consoled himself with the idea that it didn't matter - this was only a passing phase - only to be struck by the horrifying thought that plenty of others had gone through the same 'passing phase', embarking on this kind of life and joining this club with all their teeth and hair and leaving when they were toothless and bald."

This reminds me of visiting a church a few years ago.  There was a 60-ish year old woman in the row in front of me.  She looked angry and dissatisfied - not in the moment but in life.  It just hit me that I will be that age, and probably sooner rather than later.  At the time there were things I knew the Lord wanted me to do - simple but hard things for me.  It didn't feel like I was deciding to disobey.  it felt like I was waiting until later.  I have this underlying assumption that I will eventually live in obedience to God.  Looking at this older woman - who may well have been a wonderful, gracious, Godly woman but for some reason represented bitter wasted time to me - revealed the foolishness of that assumption.  The thing is, I always could have stated with absolute sincerity that in things of God, "not yet" equals "no".  It is in my religion but often not in my economics.*  I think C.S. Lewis describes that phenomenon in The Screwtape Letters.  It is very dangerous to genuinely believe a truth and be unable to see the way you habitually live in defiance of it.

*There is a quote in the introduction to Freakonomics (I think) that says something like "If you want to understand a culture's ideals, study their religion.  If you want to understand what they actually do, study their economics."

**All of the War and Peace quotes are from the Anthony Briggs translation here.

***I'm trying to do book posts on Saturdays.  Check out Semicolon's Saturday Review of Books.

Friday, July 23, 2010

I will not forget you...

But Zion said, "The LORD has forsaken me,
       the Lord has forgotten me."
 "Can a mother forget the baby at her breast
       and have no compassion on the child she has borne?
       Though she may forget,
       I will not forget you!
 See, I have engraved you on the palms of my hands;
       your walls are ever before me.
Isaiah 49:14-16
This passage was like water to my soul when we lost our babies.  It struck me in a new way when we brought David home and I adjusted to life with a nursing baby.  Suddenly even getting to the grocery store was complicated.  I had to plan my day with his needs in mind.  I couldn't be separated from him for more than two or three hours without significant planning.  In fact, as a nursing mother, it was physically painful to be away from him for more than a few hours.  Physically, I could not forget him.

A few months ago I wrote down everything I did for Rand in a day to more fully appreciate these words.


6:20  Feed and change Rand
6:40  Hold Rand
6:55  Put Rand on floor with toys
7:07  Hold Rand and do chores
7:15  Put Rand down to play
7:25  Fix Rand breaksfast
7:40  Put Rand in exersaucer
8:00 Hold Rand
8:15  Put Rand down for a nap
11:00 Feed Rand
11:15 Change Rand's diaper
11:20 Load Rand in car seat
11:45 Carry Rand in ergo for grocery store
12:40 Load Rand in car seat
1:00  Hold Rand
1:15 Rand in exersaucer
1:25 Hold Rand
1:35 Rock Rand and put him down for nap
3:30 Nurse Rand
3:45 Change Rand's diaper
3:50 Load Rand in car seat
4:00 Put Rand in exersaucer
4:30 Hold Rand
4:40 Put Rand in baby ergo for chores
5:20 Put Rand in car seat for errands
6:30 Nurse Rand
6:45 Fix Rand's dinner
6:50 Feed Rand dinner
7:10 Nurse Rand
7:20 Change Rand's diaper
7:25 Rock Rand and put him to bed

"Though she may forget, I will not forget you!"

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